Wednesday, October 31, 2012

5286...La Belle Le Prediction Tres Right On

Or may be it was just an observation.

I don't know if you recall but when this cover came out 37 months ago the whole of Quebec was beside itself about some maudit anglais magazine from frigging Toronto! calling Quebec and Quebecois corrupt.

I also don't know if you recall but Jean Drapeau ran successfully for mayor of Montreal in 1954 on a reform ticket.  His legacy is the '76 Olympics and the Billion plus he left the city in the hole, a hole that they should have paid off by 2016, 2021 at the latest.  Wasn't that a party?


5285...MItt Romney Celebrates Halloween

Every day apparently.


5284...Happy Hallowe'en/Halloween

Seriously when did they change the spelling of the day?

Best part of being Catholic when I was a kid was the fact that November 1st is/was a Holy Day of Obligation which, for kids like me going to RC schools, meant staying up late on the 31st to eat candy and being able to sleep in the next day.


5283...Montreal Is Apparently Corrupt

It is on TV and everything.

In other news:  Water is wet; sky blue and; grass is green.


5282...Life Is About Choices


Tuesday, October 30, 2012

5281...This Is Odd

Ottawa = great weather.

While the rest of the north east and Ontario suffer Ottawa, the city that has the worst weather, has the best weather.

May be these are the end days.

I won't stand too close to a Tory for sure.


Monday, October 29, 2012

5280...Hurricane Sarah Is Scary

Actually it is not scaring me a bit.  I am in Ottawa and it is going to be 17 above zero tomorrow.

Ah, Hurricane Sandy, like the Springsteen song, gotcha.  Whatever happened to him btw?

New York might be a bit diff; I hope the storm doesn't mess up the NFL for next weekend.

A caring person; I am not a caring person.


5279...Tory And NDP Politics Suck

Then again so do the politics of the Bloc and Liberals and, when given a chance, Le Greens.

Borys Wrzesnewskyj, the former and future MP for Etobicoke Centre has made a difference though.  The Liberal, a new style and progressive Liberal, was robbed last time out and as he wrote in a note to me "Our election laws are outdated and full of loopholes; and sadly I do not believe Stephen Harper will do anything to fix them."

Unlike our current PM and the ineffectual leader of the opposition Mr. Wrzesnewskyi put it all out there and "As a result of my case before the Supreme Court of Canada dealing with voting irregularities in Etobicoke Centre, our next federal elections will be run very differently. That means that democracy will prevail."

And no one is getting fat except for Mama Cass.


5278...Today Should Be A Holiday For Lefties

If you are a lefty you will appreciate what Len Berman at Len Berman's That's Sports shared with me.

On this day in 1945 'The ballpoint pen went on sale for the first time and it was a luxury item, selling for $12.50 at Gimbels."  They sold out toute and suite and I am willing to wager most of the buyers were sinister like moi.

If you are not a lefty you don't get it.


5277...Apparently There Is A Storm On The Way

It is an ill wind that doesn't blow some good.

Gonna be plus 17 in Ottawa tomorrow.

That would be your good.

Your ill would be iffen you live on Riker's Island, which is the local jail for New York City coz the whole city is on some sort of evacuation thingy except for, you got it, Riker's Island.


Sunday, October 28, 2012

5276...An Oldie But A Truthy

From SNL.


5275...Obama, Madonna, New Orleans

Even though the last GOP prez f*cked Nawlins but good the folks who paid big bux to see Madonna last nite in the Crescent City were not thrilled with her appeal for the current POTUS.

The Daily Mail reports that "Madonna drew boos and triggered a walkout by several concertgoers after she touted President Barack Obama on her 'MDNA Tour' in New Orleans."

The 82 year old pop star has been pimping hard for Barry on the stateside part of her world tour.


5274...Smarter Than A Fifth Grader

But not as smart as a sixth grader.

That would be the University of North Carolina's Erik Highsmith.

The Washington Post reports that our hero "Senior wide receiver Erik Highsmith committed plagiarism on a blog for a communications class he took last spring, according to the report, and the source material he used just so happened to be a piece on chickens written on an education Web site… by four 11-year-olds."


Saturday, October 27, 2012

5273...President Romney Creates More Jobs

In China.

But they will trickle down.


5272...Dean Del Mastro My Name Is The WFDS

El Roundo was all over the news yesterday, specifically The National Post, byatching that people that are asking questions about his alleged financial malfeasance were using the cloak of anonymity.

I am The World Famous Dan Shields.

Dean Del Mastro the above line would indicate my non anonymity.

Now, about those donations...


Friday, October 26, 2012

5271...Romney Proves Obama Kenyan Pirate

5270...It Is Everyone's Halloween

By the way, did it not usta be Hallowe'en.

Just saying.

Save some candy pour moi.


5269...I Had My Sombrero On And Everything

Yet no one came up to me at the University of Ottawa/Bishop's game tonight at the U of Zero's Montpetit Hall.

May be you weren't there; perhaps you were just nervous, understandable.

If you were not there you missed a classic U of O Gee Gees meltdown.  Up by 15 at the half; 15 at 3 quarters and; 10 with 3 mins to play the chokingest school in history figured out a way to lose by one and have the ball in the paint at the buzzer.

The more things change at the University of Allan/Allen Rock the more they stay the same.


5268...Big Investment Opportunity; Not Spam!

Lolo Jones is on the United States Women's Bobsled Team.

I don't know how one invests in Women's Bobsledding but I do know is going to explode.


5267...Meatloaf Endorses His Prez Candidate

The classic rocker, if you have no idea who he is it is all good, his biggest album came out during the Jimmy Carter, pre Joe Clark, era, has picked a Presidential candidate to throw his weight behind.

Slate reports that Meatloaf is stumping for Mitt Romney.

It's over now; you may close the store.


5266...Oh, Yeah, And He Is Going To Jail

Silvio Berlusconi would be the he and The Associated Press, reported in The Toronto Star, says that he just got sentenced to jail for not paying those pesky taxes, taxes that I may add that he was the, in theory, both payee and recipient since he was PM of Italy and all.

Anyhow Mr. Berlusconi got four years.  At 76 four years may be a lifetime.  Appeals, appeals and more appeals.

This explains his retirement, eh?


Thursday, October 25, 2012

5265...President Romney Creating Employment

It does trickle down.

Imagine what wonders he will something, something, something when he is elected.

God bless him and keep him.


5264...Lowell Green Ain't Sleeping Tonight

His newspaper, the one he helped [parenthetically at least] found, The Ottawa Sun, reported today that over 20 per cent of Canucks don't speak English or the dreaded Francais at home.

What is this country coming too?

Or is that to?




5263...Meanwhile Back In Italy

Former Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi is saying ciao to front line politics.

The avid hetrosexualist and promoter of women at all levels is 76 and tells the world via the printed page that " role will be to give advice."

Stephen Harper could appoint him to the Senate, no?


5262...Bad Week For Cardinals Of St. Louis

First the Giants of San Francisco knock them out of the hunt for the World Series and now this.

Every paper in the world reports that Pope Benedict is bringing 8 men up to the real big leagues, Rome [Italy, not New York].

None are from St. Louis.


5261...Tim Hudak Retiring In June Of 2013

Says so on the front page of your home delivered Ottawa Citizen.

The story actually says that Tim Hudak, the suburban Buffalo boy who grew up to lead the Progressive   Conservative Party of Ontario to many defeats, is going to force an election in Ontario next spring.

He will, of course, fall on his sword after getting whipped, yet again, by the Red hordes.


Wednesday, October 24, 2012

5260...If This Wasn't Sad It Would Be Poetic

A Hall of Fame catcher; a mid-western corn field and; a Ford F-150.



From Huffington Post comes the story that "…Carlton Fisk was arrested for DUI on Monday evening in Illinois, according to reports. Police sources informed TMZ and various other outlets that Fisk’s vehicle was discovered in a cornfield“Around 7:20 (Monday) night, we received a couple of calls about a vehicle in a field,”New Lenox Deputy Chief Bob Pawlisz told ESPN Chicago. “When officers went over there, they found Mr. Fisk unconscious behind the wheel.”  After reportedly being woken by police, Fisk agreed to be taken to a nearby hospital,per WLS-TV Chicago. New Lenox police told WLS-TV that an open vodka bottle was found inside of Fisk’s F-150 truck. The Chicago Tribune reports that Fisk was treated at Silver Cross Hospital before posting bail.  The bond was $300, per the Boston Herald, and Fisk is due in court in November 29."

Carlton Fisk Arrested For DUI; Found Unconscious in His Truck in a Cornfield

Looking good Mr. Fisk.


5259...Headline Of The Year V.2

From Yardbarker Morning Bark:

Mark Sanchez splits with Eva Longoria, will try hand at football

That be funny.


Tuesday, October 23, 2012

5258...Headline Of The Year

What did Justin Trudeau's dad do for a living again?  From today's Toronto Star.

Justin Trudeau’s image in Quebec is shaped by perceptions of his father

Good to see Captain Obvious is safe and sound in Toronto and has found work.


5257...Two To One Plus One To Nothing

Those would be the accepted results in the debates down south.

Two to one for El Presidente; One to nothing for El Vice Presidente.

Will this translate to the reupping of El Presidente and El Vice Presidente?


Sunday, October 21, 2012

5256...PM Calls For A Trio Of Bye Elections

Or is it byelections?

Ah, you say tomato I say refrigerator.

Cut and paste from Global.

Prime Minister Stephen Harper has announced that three federal byelections will be held on Nov. 26.
The votes will be held in the ridings of Victoria, Calgary-Centre and the Ontario riding of Durham.
The ridings became vacant when members resigned.
Former cabinet minister Bev Oda quit following controversy over her expenses, including an infamous $16 glass of orange juice, leaving the Durham riding vacant.
New Democrat Denise Savoie resigned her Victoria seat for health reasons.
Conservative Lee Richardson left in Calgary-Centre to work for Alberta Premier Alison Redford.


5255...Premier Naqvi No No No

The Ottawa Centre MPP announced on Facebook that he is going to sit this one out and return to his position as El Presidente of the provincial Liberals.

Next time.

There will always be a next time.


5254...Sometimes The Good Die Old

George McGovern, the greatest POTUS who never was, has died at the age of 90.


5253...Brigham Young Had 55 Wives

Mormons are in style these days.  A hit Broadway show, The Book of Mormon, the dude who may be elected Prez of the World in a couple of weeks.  If only Brigham Young coulda beat The Irish at South Bend today.

Speaking of Brigham Young, The New York Times has a book review of the great colonizer in today's   edition.  The book is by John G. Turner and is called Brigham Young:  Pioneer Prophet.  In the book it is revealed that Mr. Young had 55 wives.

55 wives.

Seriously, who would want 55 wives?

You miss one birthday, one anniversary you may as well miss them all.


5252...We Have A New Winner

In the big Who Gives A F*ck Contest.

Michael Ignatief.

Mr. Ignatief, the man who woulda, coulda and shoulda is in yesterday's Calgary Herald talking about the upcoming race to get his old job as Liberal boss.

The point of that would be?


Friday, October 19, 2012

5251...Violence Can And Is Justified

That's what the war on terror is all about.

It is also a credo that The Ottawa Citizen reports Jacksonville, Florida's own Allen Blair Casey subscribes to.  Or is it too?  I am certain it is not two.  I digress.  Mr. Casey felt it was justifiable for him to do violence upon his 33 year old boyfriend coz said boyfriend would not stop listening to Alanis Morrisette.

Boyfriend went to the emerg; Mr. Casey went to jail.


5250...A True Conservative Gets Caught Cheating reports that "Labradorians — including former MP Todd Russell are using some harsh words to describe Peter Penashue's overspending on his federal election campaign.  'Peter was a cheater. It's as simple as that,' said Russell, who was the Liberal incumbent but lost by a mere 79 votes in last year's election."

The Honourable Peter Penashue, he is the minister of something vaguely consequential, overspent by many Ks.  That is beaucoup d'argent especially with the paltry amount of cash one is allowed to spend to cover any riding, let alone a big ass one like Labrador's Happy Valley-Goose Bay.
The Honourable Cheater's response is "...ooops, my bad..."
Canada usta be a democracy; not so much anymore eh Stephen Harper?

5249...A True Progressive Conservative Dies

Lincoln Alexander.

He was great.

Light a candle.


Wednesday, October 17, 2012

5248...The World Ends Tomorrow Nite In Ottawa


5247...Premier Yasir Naqvi

It could happen.  The news dropped just after nine tonight in The Ottawa Citizen that the superlative MPP for Ottawa Centre has recused himself as President of the Liberal Party of Ontario to consider running for the top job, replacing the irreplaceable Dalton McGuinty.

If that happens it is back to the border for Tim Hudak, checking trunks of Buicks to make sure they haven't hidden beer in the car on the way back from another Buffalo Bills debacle.


5246...What EverWill We UseTo LineThe Birdcage?

Newspaper is the traditional birdcage liner but traditional newspapers [and it is both expensive and difficult to teach a budgie to defecate on a lap top or a tablet] are dropping like flies.

Following such esteemed rags as The Seattle Post-Intelligencer and The New Orleans Times-Picayune to the world beyond print in short fashion will be two world class Brit papers, The Guardian and The Observer.  

The Telegraph, an online edition out of Merry Ole, but with Canadian ads, tells all that the two broadsheets are bleeding about 44 million pounds sterling a year and "the publisher of the Guardian and Observer newspapers is close to axing the print editions of the newspapers, despite the hopes of its editor-in-chief Alan Rusbridger to keep them running for several years."


5245...Teacher Of The Year: I Don't Need No Bus

Got this from K-Rock 105.7 in Kingston, Ontario

Melanie Minnie a teacher in south Africa has been fined 160$ for taking 19 pre-schoolers in her car to the shopping centre for a field trip. Three of the children were in the front seat, ten in the back row and 6 in the trunk. Teacher of the year?

Resourceful and thinking outside the proverbial box.


5244...A Concise Summary Of Last Nite's Debate

From Grant Kellett at Hot 93 Sudbury


Tuesday, October 16, 2012

5243...Some Said He Did And Some Said He Did

Win the debate.

President Obama versus Governor Romney.

I think that is so cool how you keep your highest title, President, General, Governor as your honourific for ever.


5243...Apparently There Is A Debate Tonite

Barack Obama is folding like the San Diego Chargers.

My friend Blake Batson shares this on Facebook  

I find that my Dem friends are way more nervous about tonite's #debate than were my Rep friends before last debate
Like ·  ·  · @blakebatson on Twitter · 7 minutes ago via Twitter · 

True dat.


5242...Prime Minister Dalton McGuinty

He is perfect, doncha think?

He, like current Lib leader Bob Rae, led Ontario during difficult times and did a much better job than the leaders of the provinces and states bordering Ontario.

Plus we haven't had a true Irishman run the country since Brian Mulroney.


5241...Stephen Harper Please Take Note

Perhaps Molson's could help?


5240...Big Ups To Dalton McGuinty For This

Love him or hate him you have to give the Premier points for not saying he was quitting to spend more time with his family.

Straight up he is.


Monday, October 15, 2012

5239...Now Who Is Tim Hudak Going To Lose To?

Tim Hudak is the choke artist who leads the Progressive Conservative Party of Ontariariario.

Dalton McGuinty, one of the finest Premiers in the history of history, has just announced he be done.

Now the question his who will destroy Mr. Hudak this time out?


5238...What Are They Thinking In America?

My sources, which are the same as your sources, this ain't 1932, tell me that next month's prez elex in America is too close to call.


And I do mean seriously.


5237...The Mouse That Roared


A little ole African country that was colonized and dominated by the French forever has decided that it has had enough.

It has changed its official language from French to Anglais.

That'll teach 'em.

Whomever 'em is.


5236...Immigration Questions

Easily answered and at a great financial savings.

Let's get all retro and let everyone in.

As in everyone.

Another problem solved.


5235...Women Voting Is The Root Of Evil

Just minding my own business reading The Jackson Free Press and I come across this amazingly accurate quote from Janis Lane, the prez of the Central Mississippi Tea Party.

Our country might have been better off if it was still just men voting. There is nothing worse than a bunch of mean, hateful womenThey are diabolical in how than can skewer a person.

Food for thought.


Saturday, October 13, 2012

5234...Thank You Joe Pao Pao

The worst coach in the history of coachng brought his terrible Waterloo Warriors into Ottawa today and lost.

Lost 61 to nothing.

Here is the thing, we all know he sucks soooooooooooo bad as a coach.  How many crap professors and managers do they have at Waterloo?  Or do they just not give a f'k about football, like just burning the hundreds of thousands the program costs.

Either way it is a big pile of smoking bullsh*t.


Friday, October 12, 2012

5233...Greek AntiImmigrantParty OpensMTLBranch reports that Golden Dawn, a neo Nazi anti immigrant party in Greece, a party that won 18 seats in the last Greek election, has opened a branch in Montreal.

Am I the only one that finds this ironic bordering on the absurd?  

Oy and vey.


5232...Carleton Ravens In The House

The defending national champs opened the Canuckistanian portion of their schedule tonight by demolishing Queen's by a lot to a little.  At one point they were up 27 to 3; when I left it was like 70 to 30.  They will crush Laval tomorrow at 8; Sunday's victim is Dal at 2.  Look for me in my official Ravens sombrero under the west basket.

If you are in Ottawa and b*tching about there being nothing to do well this is something to do.  Next door to the hoop was a hockey game.  Carleton went down in a shoot out 4/3 to Concordia.

Canada's 46th best university in the house.


5231...Dean Del Mastro Update

Nothing since September.

Um this seems to be the Dips and the Liberals problem, eh?  The dreaded media finds a horrendous problem, El Roundo, delivers it on a bloody platter, literally, and they, the opposition, only goes for the easy kill.

That be the diff between the Blues and the rest in Ottawa.


5230...Two Words: Lloyd Bentsen

20 years ago Lloyd Bentsen was a VP candidate who destroyed the GOP candidate, Dan Quayle, in a debate on the telly.

He didn't get elected though.

Point being.


5229...Michael Vick Has A Dog

He's the Philly QB who did some time for running a dog fighting ring.  

ESPN reports that he now has a dog and it has the haters and non forgivers up in arms.

Michael Vick, who is one smooth football player btw, "...has worked with The Humane Society of the United States to speak out against animal cruelty. He's made appearances at schools and spoken to students about the dangers of being involved in dogfighting. Vick says that commitment will continue."

He goes on to talk about breaking the cycle.  He is to be commended for doing so.


Thursday, October 11, 2012

5228...Best Quote On Veep Debate

From HBO's Bill Maher

Hello 9-1-1? There s an old man beating a child on my tv.

Is funny.


5227...Wal Mart B*tch Slapped 1.46 Million Times

The Suns among others have the story of the Chatham, Ontario woman who got abused verbally at her job.

Her name is Meredith Boucher and she sued Wal Mart claiming that her store manager, Jason Pinnock, "...subjected her to verbal abuse and humiliation on the job from May to November 2009."

Gee I hope they take it out of the stronzo's bonus.


5226...For Better Or Poorer Thru This And That

It was on this day in 1975 that two love mad kids, Bill and Hillary, became as one.


Anyhow Bill Clinton and Hillary Rodham got hitched on this day 37 years ago.

That's even before Star Wars.


5225...National Coming Out Day

My Facebook buddy and king of the sex columnists, Dan Savage, tells me that today is National Coming Out Day.

Five p.m. your time.

Would someone be kind enough to forward this to Rob Anders and Vic Toews.


Wednesday, October 10, 2012

5224...Premier Marois Asks Feds4Earthquake Help

La Belle's biggest city hit with earthquake.

Photo: we will rebuild

You know she is on the phone to our beloved Prime Minister as I write this.


5223...The Mad Duck Is Dead

Alex Karras, who I first encountered in George Plimpton's must read Paper Lion, has died at 77 from the same thing that kills a ton of football players.  Hit in the head disease aka dementia.

The former Detroit Lion and star of Webster was 77.

Funny man.


Monday, October 8, 2012

5222...Merry Christmas

From my dear friend Blake Batson who shows and tells that it is Christmas in the mall of Trinidad.

It also seems to be customer free day in the mall of Trinidad.


Sunday, October 7, 2012

5221...It Is A Pink Sunday

NFL goes pink for breast cancer.

All October.

I am both a fan and an owner.

Well a fan of the NFL and an owner of breasts.

I am also a breast fan.

Plus pink is my fave colour.

Win, win, win and win.


Friday, October 5, 2012

5220...Accurate Review Of Obama/Romney Debate


5219...Mitt Romney Celebrates Cdn Thanksgiving


5218...Our Courts Do Not Reflect Canada

My real world friend Rachel Decoste makes that point on Facebook today

Today in 1967: Thurgood Marshall becomes 1st Black Supreme Court Justice. 2012: Canada's Supreme Court still 100% white. #progress?
I think I know why.  


Thursday, October 4, 2012

5216...200 Mill Football Stadium For Regina


And Ottawa cannot decide where to put the new casino.

Just sayin'.


5215...President Romney In The House

All but the most loyal/deluded followers of Barack Obama had his challenger, Mitt Romney, killing it during last night's Presidential debates.

Best line I read this morning came from James Carville.  Ol' Serpent Head said that "Romney brought a chainsaw."

You could look it up.


5214...The Last Best Chance

That is the way Justin Trudeau is being positioned in regards to the leadership of the Liberal Party of Canada.





Wednesday, October 3, 2012

5213...Stephen Harper And Vic Toews Should

Read this.  From Len Berman's That's Sports.

5. Crime Prevention This has nothing whatsoever to do with sports, but I found it funny. In Manchester England, a local supermarket has a 6-foot cardboard cutout of a policeman. It deters shoplifting. Actually the supermarket used to have it. Somebody stole it.

Beauty, eh?


5212...Presidential Debate Drinking Game 4 2nite

From K-Rock 105.7 in Kingston, Ontario comes this

Prepare to be drunk.

Very, very, v e r y drunk.


5211...Who Drinks The Most Coffee On The Job

I thought it would be coppers.  As it turns out they don't even make the survey Dunkin' Donuts and Career Builder did last year. had the complete list which I share with you.


5210...They Are Going To Run Out Of Names

My Facebook friend Scott Tribe writes that "Interesting note: The Weather Channel in the US is going to start naming major winter storms/blizzards - as Hurricanes are given names."

That will be funningly weird.


Tuesday, October 2, 2012

5209...Allan Rock Makes The Right Move

He's a former contender for the leadership of the federal Liberals, back in the days when that meant something, anyhow he landed on his feet and is the Grand Pooba at the University of Ottawa, one of the top five universities in the National Captial Region.

The right move he made was having his peeps cashier their horrific football coach, Gary Etcheverry.
He was winless as in awful, Mr. Etcheverry was.  Last week he was quoted in one of the local fishwraps that the problem with the team at the U of Zero was that they had too much talent.  Yeah, gotta hate when that happens.

All I ask Mr. Rock is please, please, pretty please with sugar on it, don't hire Joe Pao Pao.


5208...Glenn Beck Be On The Pipe Again

Glenn Beck, the superstar right wing American talker, told Right-Wing Watch that Mitt Romney is part of God's plan to something something something.

The reports it this way "Conservative talk show host Glenn Beck says that GOP hopeful Mitt Romney’s poll numbers have fallen as a part of a plan from God to make it obvious to the American people that divine intervention was responsible when Republicans take the White House in November. "

Napoleon IV was not available for comment but expects to see Mr. Beck sooner rather than later.


5207...Best Halloween Costume Ever

From my Facebook and real world friend Greg Ross